( * as Alvin Stardust )
Chart entered : 23 March 1985
Chart peak : 55
After a long and remarkable chart run it was time for Bernard to say goodbye. Shane Fenton and the Fentones had quickly run aground in the Beatles era after chalking up six hits and split up in 1964. For nearly a decade he was out of the spotlight as an A & R man and club performer with wife Iris. Then Peter Shelley ( the other one ) asked him to front a record he had recorded as "Alvin Stardust" called "My Coo-Ca-Choo" which was already climbing the charts in December 1973. With a hastily contrived image based on Gene Vincent , Bernard appeared on Top of the Pops despite having nothing to do with the record. Tony Blackburn was the first person to recognise him as the former Shane Fenton. The record was kept off the top spot by Slade but the identikit follow-up "Jealous Mind" got to number one in 1974. For a short time Alvin ( as we'll now call him ) was a big star and did a series of Green Cross Code commercials but glam was already on the turn and his run of hits apparently petered out in 1975. Magnet dropped him in 1977 but four years later he was picked up by Stiff, looking to ride on the coat-tails of Shakin' Stevens' success. His rock and roll version of Nat King Cole's "Pretend" reached number 4 in 1981 but he only managed to give Stiff one more minor hit from five subsequent singles. In 1984 he signed with Chrysalis and rewarded them with four more hits of which this was the last. He was helped by tabloid interest in his relationship with actress Liza Goddard.
"Got A Little Heartache " was written by the Graham Lyle / Terry Britten partnership and produced by Shaky's producer Stuart Colman. It's a pleasant enough pop rock track with a Motown backbeat and some surprisingly good guitar work from Dave Edmunds . It does take a bit too long to get to the chorus which is probably why it didn't get much airplay and was only a minor hit.
Alvin was then guilty of a dreadful error of judgement . He was talked into performing a song at the British heat for Eurovision. With little to gain and much to lose - by this time the British finalist wasn't guaranteed a sizable hit but the losers in the heat were guaranteed for obscurity - Alvin came third , the winner being the instantly forgettable Love Is " by Vikki. The song "Clock On The Wall " is a vacuous 12 bar blues sounding like Shaky fronting Status Quo but it was fit for purpose and Alvin was head and shoulders above every one else in terms of public profile. Perhaps the voting public thought that was unfair and punished him accordingly.
Chrysalis recognised the disaster and halted the pressing of the single - it eventually came out as part of a double pack with the re-released "So Near To Christmas" later that year. He released another song by the same writers "Sleepless Nights" in June but I never heard it and I don't think many other people did either.
Alvin then found God and joined the cast of the Rock Gospel TV show , releasing the duet "I Hope And I Pray" with Christian singer Sheila Walsh ( she'd later have a minor hit with Cliff ) . It's unbearable jollity sets my teeth on edge and Barry Blue's bombastic Fairlight noises certainly sounds like the devil's work to me.
Alvin's last release for Chrysalis "Just Like Lovers " was fittingly sneaked out under a nom de plume , The Jury ( see what he did there ? ) but the verdict was another miss.
Alvin almost certainly realised by now that his time as a top pop star was over and he was already getting into musical theatre. Magnet sentimentally let him cut a last single for them "Jailhouse Rock ( The Coming Out Mix ) " in October 1986. Over three years elapsed before "Christmas" a Betjeman poem and a collaboration with Mike Read (!! ) slipped out on a tiny label. He also presented a children's magazine programme, It's Stardust Time in 1989.
As the decade turned Alvin decided to go down the Gary Glitter route - only in his professional life I must add - and turn his concerts into a full blown pantomime act , tottering about on ridiculous heels with a monster quiff wig. He nearly came a cropper when he collapsed on stage in 1994. Reports vary on the cause ; some say a firecracker went off near his face and he over-balanced in pulling away from it while Alvin himself said he fainted through the heat in the wig and being elevated to near the lighting rig.
Thankfully Alvin recovered to take part in Channel Four's Glam Top 10 and release a comedy version of "My Coo-Ca-Choo" with Jo Brand which sank like a stone. Is there anything sadder than a comedy record that nobody buys ? Well yes there is but we'll get to that in a moment.
Alvin continued to tour although failing health curtailed his schedule after being diagnosed with prostate cancer at the beginning of 2013. Alvin very nearly died with his platform boots on as he passed away just a day after his final concert at Evesham in October 2014 aged 72. It turned out that our man had one more new guise to pull off from beyond the grave as he had a posthumous album ready to go. "Alvin " is an album of slow sombre tunes with our man largely sticking to a deep growl although his voice stayed in pretty good nick to the end. Alvin sounds like he's been listening to Scott Walker, The The and Tom Waits but most of all Johnny Cash . Mr Rubin, you have a lot to answer for ! There was genuine grief at Alvin's passing but this didn't stretch to buying his final musical testament.
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