473 Hello Cameo - She's Strange

Chart  entered : 31  March  1984

Chart  peak : 37  ( 22  on  re-issue  in  1985 )

Number  of  hits  : 10

From  Pete  Burns  we  move  on  to  another  guy  who  liked  to  advertise  his  "credentials ".

I'd  no  idea  this  lot  had  a  considerable  history. Main  man  Larry  Blackmon  was  born  in  New  York  in  1956  and  started  out  as  a  session  drummer. He  played  on  the  first  two  singles  by  the  vocal  trio  Black  Ivory , "Don't  Turn  Around", "You  And  I"   which  were  both  moderate  hits  in  the  US. Both  are  soft  soul  in  the  Stylistics  mould. In  1973  he  and  keyboard  player  Greg  Johnson  formed  the  band  East  Coast  with  singer  Gwen  Guthrie  ( of  Ain't  Nothing  Going  On  But  The  Rent  fame ) . They  released  one  eponymous  album  in  1973 . I've  heard  four  tracks  which  are  decent  examples  of  early  70s  urban  soul  although  Gwen's  vocals  could  certainly  do  with  being  polished  up.

Larry  and  Johnson  then  formed  the  New  York  City  Players  , a  13-man  collective  signed  to  Casablanca's  Chocolate  imprint  in  1976. Their  first  single  "Find  My  Way"  was  meant  to  be  released  under  the  name , "The  Players"  but  they  changed  their  name  to  Cameo  fearing  a  lawsuit  from  the  Ohio  Players.  I  have  little  idea  who  the other  members  were  until  their  first  album  "Cardiac  Arrest "  in  1977. The   only  ones  from  that  who  survived  into  the  line  up  for  this  single  were  Larry, co-vocalist  Tomi  Jenkins  and  trumpeter  Nathan  Leftenant ; Johnson  had  quit  in  1978.

"She's  Strange"  was  the  title  track  from  their  tenth  album  and  I  won't  pretend  for  a  moment  that  I've  listened  all  the  way  through  each  of  them. Checking  out  their  long  list  of  singles  that  didn't  break  out  of  the  R &  B  chart  is  probably  enough. They  pitched  their  tent  halfway  between  Parliament / Funkadelic  and  Earth, Wind  &  Fire  lacking  the  out  there  zaniness  of  the  former  or  the  good  pop  tunes  of  the  latter. Their  debut  single  "Find  My  Way"  is  a  lightweight  disco  number  but  the  subsequent  singles  from  their  debut  LP  "Cardiac  Arrest "  had  a  harder  funk  sound. 1978's  "It's  Over"  featuring  singer  Wayne  Cooper  and  a  surfeit  of  xylophones  showed  they  could  do  ballads  as  well. Its  parent  LP  "We  All  Know  Who  We  Are"  got  to  number  58  in  the  US. Their  third  "Ugly  Ego"  followed  in  the  same  year and  reached  number  85. 1979's  "Secret  Omen" restored  their  upward  trajectory  reaching  number  46.

By  the  turn  of  the  eighties  the  band  were  starting  to  use  synthesisers  more  as  heard  on  the  Prince-like "Shake  Your  Pants"  the  lead  single  for  their  next  album  "Cameosis"  which  reached  number  25. That  was  the  first  of  two  albums  in   1980  , the  second  being  "Feel  Me" which  got to  44. Its  lead  single  "Keep  It  Hot "  is  the  first  to  feature  Larry's  trademark  nasal "Yow"s,   1981's "Knights  of  The  Sound  Table"  album   was  the  first  to  feature  guitarist  Charlie  Singleton  though  only  as  a  vocalist.  It  reached  number  44.

With  1982's  "Alligator  Woman"  changes  were  afoot. It  was  Johnson's  last  album  with  the  band  and  his  replacement  Kevin  Kendrick  is  also  credited  as  a  keyboard  player  on  the  album.  With  the  shift  towards  a  more  electronic  sound  and  the  advances  in  drum  technology  Larry  was  freed  from  the  drum  stool  to  become  the  pop-eyed  frontman  with  the  red  cod  piece  ( though  that  came  later )  we  all  remember. It  was  their  highest  charting  album  ( number  23 )  but  their  last  for  Chocolate  City  as  they  switched  to  Atlanta  Artists.

The  change  in  sound  also  allowed  Larry  to  trim  the  band  down  to   a  five  piece  of  him  Tomi, Charlie, Nathan  and  Kevin  for  1983's  "Style". That  reached  number  53,  its  cause  perhaps  not  helped  by  one  of  the  singles  being  a  pretty  dreadful  version  of  "Can't  Help  Falling  In  Love". Before  the  next  album  they  were  joined  by  bassist  Melvin  Wells.

"She's  Strange "  (  I  think  it's  meant  as  a  comlpliment  ) saw  them  moving  on  to  hip  hop. Larry  does  the  verses  as  a  soft-edged   rap  over  a  slamming  backbeat  and   lazy   funk  bass  line   while  Kevin  plays  Spaghetti  Western  motifs  on  the  keys  to  provide  some  melody. It  was  helped  along  by  a  cool  video  with  some  tasty  "chicks", both  real  and  not-so-real  and  was  their  breakthrough  single  on  both  sides  of  the  Atlantic  reaching  number  47  in  the  US. Not  really  my  cup  of  tea  but  by  God  they  deserved  it !

472 Hello Dead Or Alive - That's The Way ( I Like It )

Chart  entered :  24  March  1984

Chart  peak : 22

Number  of  hits : 10

Test  yourself  here. Can  you  name  any  of  their  other  hits  besides  this  one  and  their  chart topper  a  year  later ?  Or  alternatively  can  you  name  any  other  member  of  Dead  Or  Alive.  There  is  sometimes  a  gulf   between  being  a  great  pop  star  and  making  great  pop  music  to  justify  that  position  and  I  think  Pete  Burns  and  co   fall  into  it.

Pete  was  born  in  Bebington  in  1959.  He  became  a  habitue  of  the  Liverpool  punk  scene  around  Eric's  and  joined  Julian  Cope, Pete  Wylie  and  Phil  Hurst  in  a  band  called  The  Mystery  Girls  who  were  one  gig  wonders  in  1977.  He  next  found  employment  in  a  band  called  Nightmares  in  Wax   in  1979  at  the  same  time  as  working  in  a  record / clothes  shop  called  Probe.

Pete's  now  pretty  dismissive  of  the  group   who  made  just  one  single  , the  EP  "Birth  of  A Nation"  on  the  Inevitable  label   in  March  1980. The   lead  track  "Black  Leather "  is  an  unambiguous  ode  to  being  shafted  on  a  motorbike  delivered  in  a  guttural  punk  snarl  by  Pete  over  a  rough  facsimile  of  Simple  Minds'  I  Travel.  There's  a  simulated  orgasm  mid song  just  in  case  any  daytime  jock   was  tempted  to  play  it   and  it  segues  into  KC  and  the  Sunshine  Band's  That's  The  Way  ( I  Like  It  )  towards  the  end. The  other  two  tracks  are  "Girls  Song" , a  macabre  synth  ditty  reminiscent  of  Mute  stalwarts  Fad  Gadget  and  the  tuneless  Goth  rock  of  "Shangri-la".

In  mid  1980  Pete  and  his  chief  collaborator, keyboardist  Martin  Healy  changed  the  name  of  the  band  to  Dead  Or  Alive. Their  first  single  under  the  new  name  was  "I'm  Falling"   in  March  1981  which  was  produced  by  Ian  Broudie. It's  a  pounding  Goth  rock  number  about  nothing  in  particular  with  doomy  keyboards  and  Pete  doing  a  near-perfect  impersonation  of  Jim  Morrison.  By  the  time  of  their  second  single, "Number  Eleven "  in  August  that  year  the  line  up  had  almost  completely  changed  with  Pete  the  sole  survivor. Coming  in  at  this  point  were  drummer  Steve  Coy, bassist  Mike  Percy , keyboard  player  Timothy  Lever  and  guitarist  Wayne  Hussey . "Number  Eleven"  is  in  much  the  same  vein  as  the  previous  single  sounding  not  unlike  Hussey's  future  employers.

Their  third  single  "The  Stranger", released  on  their  own  Black  Eyes  label  ( named  after  Pete's  penchant  for  wearing  black  contact  lenses ) in  1982   is  so  similar  to  their  Liverpool  contemporaries  Echo  and  the  Bunnymen  you  think  it  must  be  a  tribute  of  some  sort  but  it  did  well  enough  on  the  independent  chart  to  get  them  a  record  deal  with  Epic  who  thought  they  had  their  own  Boy  George  with  Pete.

Their  first  single  for  Epic   "Misty  Circles"   in  May  1983  rather  strangely  seems  to  be  about  their  lack  of  success  and  consequent  crisis  of  confidence. It's  also  their  poorest  to  date, swapping  the  goth  rock  sound  for  juddery  electro-funk  but  it's  completely  tuneless.  Wayne  left  the  group  by  the  time  the  next  single  was  released  but  he  had  a  big  hand  in  the  writing  of  their  debut  album  and  played  on  the  next  three  singles.  The  follow  up  "What  I  Want  " is  so  slavishly  in  thrall  to  Blue  Monday   they  must  have  been  taking  the  piss.   It  makes  the  title  of  their  next  single  "I'd  Do  Anything"  all  too  appropriate. That's  a  spiky  chant   over  a  robotic  electro-funk  backing  that's  all  production  and  no  song.

With  three  flops , and  the  release  of  the  album  "Sophisticated  Boom  Boom"  held  over  for  want  of  a  hit.  the  band  were  in  last  chance  saloon  when  this  one  was  released. The  song  was  of  course  the  signature  hit  for  KC  and  the  Sunshine  Band  in  1975  epitomising  that  mid-seventies  hedonistic  excess,  topping  the  US  charts  and  reaching  number  4  here. Few  songs  evoke  that  period  better,  particularly  because  of   the  similarity  - noted  at  the  time -  between  the  backing  singers'  refrain  and  the  music  that  accompanied  the  Pearl  and  Dean  trailer  for  cinema  ads  throughout  the  seventies.

Dead  Or  Alive's  version  keeps  the  horns  and  the  female  backing  singers  but  substitutes  a  sludgy  electro-dance  backing  track  for  the  original  funk  rhythms   and  adds  a  male  chant  of  "Keep  that , Keep  that  body  strong"  over  that  iconic  refrain  like  an  all-too-eighties  jackboot  trampling  on  a  hallowed  piece  of  memorabilia. Having  destroyed  the  best  bit  of  the  song , Pete  barks  out  the  lyrics  in  his  stentorian  snarl  and  it  becomes  a  charmless  grind.  He  appeared  on  Top  of  the  Pops  wearing  what  appeared  to  be  a  female  swimming  costume  which  emphasised  his,  erm,  package , aided  and  abetted  by  the  camera  man. Boy  George  didn't  miss  the  opportunity  to  bitch  saying  his  mum  thought it  was  disgusting  and  suggesting  Pete's  thighs  were  a  bit  wobbly. The  viewers  may  have  agreed  it  was  a  bit  much  as  the  single  only  climbed  three  places  after  the  performance.    

471 Hello Aswad - Chasing for the Breeze

Chart  entered :  3  March  1984

Chart  peak : 51

Number  of  hits : 17

Here's  another  band  who  took  some  time  time  to  crack  the  charts.

Aswad  were  formed  in  London  in  1975  by  a  group  of second  generation  West Indian  immigrants.  The  name  is  Arabic  for  "black  ". The  founding  members  were  Brinsley  Forde  ( vocals / guitar ), Angus  Gaye  ( vocals / drums ), Donald  Griffiths ( vocals / guitar ) , George  Oban  ( bass )   and  Courtney  Hemmings  ( keyboards ). Brinsley  had  already  been  in  the  public  eye  a few  years  earlier  playing  Spring  in  the  seminal  Here  Come  The  Double Deckers    ( my  thoughts  here ). The  band  played  reggae  and  were  quickly  snapped  up  by  Chris  Blackwell  for  Ireland.

Their  debut  single  was  "Back  To  Africa "  written  by  Hemmings  , a   slow and  steady  groove where  the  mournful  melody  seems  at  odds  with  the  joyful  anticipation  of  the  lyrics. Hemmings'  keyboard  contributions  garnish  it  nicely.  It  was  the  only  single  taken  from  their  eponymous  debut  album. Shortly  after  its  release  Hemmings  quit  and  was  replaced  by  Tony  Robinson.

 The  follow-up  was  "Three  Babylon"  , a  grim  account  of  police  harrassment - "They  come  to  have  fun  with  their  long  truncheon " -  with  a  descending  piano  melody  that  UB40  re-tooled for  One  In  Ten.  These  records  didn't  sell  in  any  great  quantities  but  got  the  band's  name  known  in  the  world  of  reggae  and  they  soon  found  work  as  a  pick-up  band  for  reggae  stars  visiting  the  UK. They  backed  Burning  Spear  and  all  three  of  The  Wailers.

Their  second  album  was  "Hulet"  released  in  1979. It's  usual  when  writing  about  Aswad  to  draw  a  thick  red  line  between  the  pre-fame  period  and  their  success  with  reggaefied  Diane  Warren  songs   but  they  were  never  inaccassible. The  songs  on  "Hulet"   are melodic, the  lyrics  intelligible  to  a  non-Rasta  audience  and  the  dub  trickery  never  gets  self-indulgent. It  is  though  very  samey  with  everything  at  the  same  tempo and  suffused  with  minor-key  moodiness. They're  like  The  Wailers  dampened  down  with  British  grey  sky  pessimism.  There  were  no  singles  released  from  the  album.   After the  LP's  release   it  was  Oban's  turn  to  quit  with  Tony  adding  bass  to  his  keyboard  duties.    

In  1980  they  contributed  a  couple  of  songs  to  the  film  "Babylon"  including  the  instrumental  "Warrior  Charge"  which  was  released  as  their  next  single  that  September.  It's  OK  except    for  the  Rose  Royce  syn-drums  which  date  it  badly.

After  that  Griffiths  quit  leaving  them  a  trio. Island  put  out  a  compilation  of  their  previous  work  "Showcase"  in  early  1981  putting  the  unmemorable  "Babylon"  as  a  trailer  single  to  advertise  it. Aswad  then  left  the  label  and  signed  with  CBS.

Their  first  release  for  CBS  was  the  standalone  single  "Finger  Gun  Style "  which  loses  both  message  and  melody  in  an  over-cluttered  arrangement.  The  subsequent  album  "New  Chapter"  saw  the  band  adopting  a  fuller  sound  despite  the  reduction  in  personnel  with  the  help  of  hired  horns. The  lead  single  "Ways  of  the  Lord "  uses  them  to  full  effect  on  a  rather  lumpy  exhortation  to  universal  brotherhood  on  which  the  harmonies  sound  a  little  off  key.

In  May  1982  their  new  single  "Pass  The  Cup"  was  in  a  much  poppier  vein  as  they  made  more  strides  towards  commercial  success. The  follow  up  "Girl's  Got  To  Know"  is  less  fun, it's  anti-materialistic  message  marred  by  a  whiff  of  misogyny  and  a  dreary  tune  to  boot. Their  third  single  that  year  "African  Children  ( Part  2  )"  doesn't  get  into  its  groove  until  halfway  through  , its  striving  for  the  epic  statement  let  down  by  a  pedestrian  tune.  None  of  these singles  were  hits  but  they  did  carry  the  parent  album  "Not  Satisfied"  to  number  50  so  there  were  encouraging  signs  for  the  band.

It  wasn't  enough  for  CBS  who  dropped  them  but  Island  were  happy  to  have  them  back. In  August  1982  they  played  at  the  Notting  Hill  Festival. The  gig  was  recorded  and  released  as  the  album  "Live  And  Direct " in  1983. It  reached  number  57.

"Chasing  for  the  Breeze"   was  the  lead  single  for  the  next  album.  Written  by  the  trio , it's  a  morose  slice  of  life  commentary  contrasting  the  economic  struggle  of  working  class  adulthood  with  happier  times  at  school. It's  a  reasonable  tune  with  some  nice  horn  work  again, a  serviceable  guitar  solo  and  a  metallic  keyboard  part  that's  oddly  reminiscent  of  Yazoo's  Ode  To  Boy.  It's  a  bit  lumpy  to  really  succeed  as  a  pop  single  but  it  was  good  enough  to  put  down  their  marker  on  the  singles  chart.

470 Hello Loose Ends - Tell Me What You Want

Chart  entered : 25  February  1984

Chart  peak : 74

Number  of  hits : 12

You  could  fit  what  I  previously  knew  about  this  lot  on  a  postage  stamp  but  they  easily  qualify  for  inclusion  here.

Loose  Ends  were  the  brain  child  of   multi-instrumentalist  Steve  Nichol  who  formed  the  band  as  Loose  End  in  1980. Guitarist  and  singer  Carl  McIntosh  was  found  through  auditions ; his  co-vocalist  Jane  Eugene  was  discovered  at  a  college  fashion  show. They  signed  for  Virgin  in  1981  but  were  temporarily  sidelined  by  Steve's  commitments  with  The  Jam. He  played  the trumpet  on  The  Gift  and  was  part  of  the line  up  for  both  the  tour  of  that  name  and  their  farewell  tour  , playing  trombone  and  keyboards  on  stage  as  well. In  between  those  two  tours  Loose  End  released  their  debut  single  "In  The  Sky", a  solid  jazz  funk  number  sung  by  Jane  with  a  snazzy  sax  solo  from  guest  Lloyd  Dwyer. It  was  produced  by  The  Real  Thing's  Chris  and  Eddie  Amoo.  It  was  followed  by  "We've  Arrived "  written  and  produced  by  James  Hargreaves  and  Tony  Ajabe    which   has  a  more  electronic  sound  and  an  interesting  banjo  in  the  mix.

For  their  third  single  "Don't  Hold  Back  Your  Love"  in  1983  they  turned  to  Shalamar  producer  Peter  Walsh. It's  a  polished  soul/funk  number  which  probably  sounded  OK  in  a  night  club  on  Canvey  Island  but  doesn't  have  the  hooks  for  radio.

With  three  flops  already  under  their  belt  the  band  were  under  a  bit  of  pressure  by  1984. With  this  one  Carl  took  the  lead  vocal  for  the  first  time   on  a  song  he  co-wrote  with  Steve  and  someone  called  Shell. Jane  does  some   answering  vocals  as  the  girl  who's  a  bit  of  a  tease.  It  has a  more  upfront  groove  and  a  lengthy  guitar  solo  in  the  latter  half  and  is  a  clear  step  forward  in  terms  of  having  wider  commercial  appeal. It  still  wasn't  much  of  a  hit  but  at  least  got  them  on  the  board.

 

469 Hello Sade - Your Love Is King

Chart  entered : 26  February  1984

Chart  peak : 6

Number  of  hits : 13

These  lot  ( they  were  a  band ) were  the  most  prominent  of  the  "New  Jazz"  artists. It's  hard  to  recall  just  how  big  a  deal  they  were in  1984. Record  Mirror  treated  their  singer  Helen  Sade  Adu  as  a  goddess  before  she'd  had  a  record  out.  No  one  else  got on  the  bill  at  Live  Aid  with  such  a  slender  back  catalogue.

Sade  were  a  breakout  group  from  an  earlier  soul  band  called  Pride  that  started  out  in  London  in  1981  although  three  members,  Stuart  Matthewman  ( guitar/saxophone ) , Paul Denman  ( bass )  and  Paul  Cooke  ( drums  )  were  originally  from  Hull. The  group  also  featured  Helen  as  a  backing  vocalist . Helen  was  born  in  Nigeria  although  her  mother  was  English. Her parents  separated  when  she  was  4  and  Helen  moved  with  her  mother  to  Essex. She  studied  fashion  design  at  St  Martin's  College  of  Art  and  did  some  part-time  modelling. Some  demos  and  live  recordings  have  hit  YouTube  revealing  Pride  to  be  a  rather  lumpy  white  funk  outfit  with  an  indifferent  singer. However  Helen  and  Stuart  hit  it  off  together  and  started  writing  songs . They  were  allowed  a  separate  slot  within  Pride  shows  to  perform  one  or  two  songs  backed  by  the two  Pauls. Pride  were  backed  by Peter  Powell  and  featured  on  The  Oxford  Road  Show  in  1982.  They  failed  to  get  a   record  deal  and  Helen  and  her  collaborators  felt  they  stood  a  better  chance  of  making  it  without  the  others.

Sade  became  an  independent  band  in  1983 , adding  keyboard  player  Andrew  Hale  to  the  line  up.  With  the  help  of   Helen's  boyfriend, style  journalist  Robert  Elms  and  frequent  gigging  they  soon  got  a  record  deal  with  Epic  or  rather  Helen  did  and  the rest  of  the  guys  signed  as  contractors  to  her  except  for  Cooke  who  wasn't  having  it  and  quit. Dave  Early  was  brought  in  to  complete  the  album  but  the  band  never  had  a  permanent  drummer thereafter . I'm  not  sure  whether  Cooke  or  Early  played  on  "Your  Love  Is  King"; neither  appear  in  the  video.  

"Your  Love  Is  King"  was  their  debut  single  and  was  rapturously  received  by  the  music  press.  In  an  era  blighted  by  bombastic  over-production  it's  not  hard  to  see  the  appeal  of  a  low-key  torch  ballad  somewhere  between  jazz  and  soul  delivered  with  smoky  grace  by  a  beautiful  but  demure  singer. Stuart's  sax  solo  does  sound  all  too  eighties, the  stuff  of  a  thousand  dreary  power  ballads ,  but  it's  perhaps  unfair  to  blame  him  for  all  that  came  after.
It's  fine  for  what  it  is  but  it's  hard  to  see  why  people  got  so  excited  about  it  and  her  music  was   most  enthusiastically  adopted  by  the  burgeoning  yuppie  brigade  as  a  lifestyle  accessory  leaving  her  leftie  champions  to  grapple  with  the  irony.  Sade's  disinclination  to  move  very  far  from  this  musical  territory would  ultimately  limit  their  appeal  and  this  remains  their  biggest  hit  but  for  this  short  time  they  were  kings  of  the  heap.

468 Hello Hazell Dean - Evergreen / Jealous Love

Chart  entered : 18  February  1984

Chart  peak : 63

Number  of  hits : 11

It's  time  for  another  female  and  probably  the  least  pretentious  artist  to  feature  here.

Hazel  Dean  Poole  was  born  in  Chelmsford   in  1952  and  went  into  the  clubs  as  a  singer. She  was  spotted  by  Decca  and  started  working  with  Eurovision  song writer  and  producer  Paul  Curtis. I  haven't  heard  her  first  single  "Our  Day  Will  Come"  in  October  1975. Her  second  was  a  Eurovision  contender  - Curtis  had  written  The  Shadows'  British   heat  winner "Let  Me  Be  The  One"   in  1975 - "I  Couldn't  Live  Without  You  For  A Day"  a  big  dramatic  MOR  ballad. She  appeared  at  the  British  finals  at  the  Royal  Albert  Hall , knocking  a  few  years  off  her  age. Despite  a  note-perfect  performance  she  came  eighth  out  of  twelve. Perhaps  wearing  one  of  her  curtains  put  people  off.

Hazel  moved  into  disco  and  recorded  a  number  of  fast-paced  dance  singles  - "Got  You  Where  I  Want  You" ," Look  What  I  Found  At  the  End  Of  The  Rainbow", "No  One's  Ever  Gonna  Love  You"   - which  were  popular  on  the  Northern  Soul  scene.  Her  final  single  for  Decca,  the  ballad  "Who  Was  That  Lady"  is  an  uncanny  Diana  Ross  impersonation. None  of  them  got  near  the  charts  but  the  popularity  she  had   built on  the  club  scene  as  Northern  Soul  mutated  into   Hi-N R G    would  stand  her  in  good  stead.

Hazel  had  no  record  deal in  the  UK  for  the  next  five  years; her  only  release  was  in  The Netherlands , a  duet  with  Curtis  as  "Curtis  and  Dean" . "You  Got  Me  Wrong"  is  a  fairly  unremarkable  Eurodisco  track  but  did  point  the  way  towards  her  future  direction. Two  years  later  she  released  "Searchin"  there ( with  the  extra  "L"  added  to  her  name  )  and  scored  a  European  success  with  this  seminal  Hi-NRG  track. Hi-NRG  was  huge  in  Scotland   and  the  North  of  England  ,something  that  the  UK  chart  was  often  slow  to  reflect, raising  questions  about  the  geographical  spread  of  the  chart  return  shops. "Searchin"  bubbled  under  throughout  the  latter  part  of  1983 , helped  by  its  popularity  in  gay  clubs , but  couldn't  break  into  the  charts  until  re-released  after  this one.

"Evergreen "  is  the  Barbara  Streisand  song  from  A  Star  Is  Born  appropriately  speeded  up   to  match  the  Moroder-esque  backing  track. Despite  that  Hazell  does  her  best  to  imitate  Streisand's  phrasing ; she  doesn't  quite  get  there  but  it's  still a  good  showcase  for  her  vocal  talents. "Jealous  Love "  is  her  own  song  about  getting  fed  up  of  her  partner's  suspicions  and  has  a  faster  tempo . Hazel  sings  it  in  a  higher  range  and  it's  very  reminiscent  of  The  Dooleys'  later  efforts. It's  a  decent  enough  pop  song  but  neither  side  is  up  there  with  her best  records.  Both  sides  were  available  in  extended  form  on  the  12  inch  single  and  I  suspect  that  accounted for  a  substantial  part  of  the  single's  sales.

467 Hello Matt Bianco -Get Out of Your Lazy Bed

Chart  entered : 11  February  1984

Chart  peak : 15

Number  of  hits  : 10

Hello  Matt  Bianco ? ..... You're  a  bunch  of  wankers !!

Thus  said   caller  Simon  on  Saturday  Superstore   and  it's  hard  to  argue  with  him.  Matt  Bianco  were  representatives  of  a  London-led  attempt  to  prevent  a  resurgence  of  rock  as the  New  Pop  threw  up  such  unappetising  fare  as  Jones  and  Kershaw.  Championed  by  the  likes  of  DJ  Gary  Crowley  and  Jim  Reid  at  Record  Mirror , the  answer  was  to  return  to  the  early  sixties  and  support  anyone  whose  main  influences  were  jazz. They  were bolstered  by  the  decision  of  a  major  rock  star  in  Paul  Weller   ( later  to  be  joined  by  Sting ) to  turn  his  back  on  rock  music. There  was  a  political  side  to  this  as  well. While  rock  had  produced  its  fair  share  of  anti-establishment  radicals,  it  was  now  perceived  by  the  Islington   left  as  innately  conservative  and  ideologically  suspect . We'll  meet  some  other  beneficiaries  of  this  shortly  but  Matt  Bianco  were  first  out  of  the  traps.

Matt  Bianco  were  formed  from  the  ashes  of  an  earlier  attempt  to  shift  the  cultural  goal  posts.  By  the  summer  of  1981  music  journalists  were  anxious  to  move  on  from  the  New  Romantic  movement  and  latched  on  to  salsa  as  the  Next  Big  Thing. Accordingly  they  threw  their  weight  behind  Blue  Rondo  a  la  Turk , a  Latin  jazz  collective  helmed  by  punk  failure   Chris  Sullivan . Virgin  were  hoodwinked  by  the  hype  and  gave  them  a  deal. In  their  line  up  were  guitarist  Mark  Reilly  and  bassist  Kit  Poncioni .

In  one  of  the  most  celebrated  cases  of  chart  gazumping, while  Blue  Rondo  were  in  the  studio  , a  couple  of  opportunistic  plastic  punks  operating  in  the  group  Modern  Romance  appropriated  the  salsa  style  and  scored  two  big  hits  before  Blue  Rondo's  debut  single  got  out  of  the  traps. "Me  And  Mr  Sanchez"  peaked  at  a  less  than  impressive  number  40  in  November  1981  and   those  journos  who  hadn't  bought  into  them  were  quick  to  highlight  their  failure. Personally  I  think  it  would  have  struggled  without  Modern  Romance's  intervention. The  band  kick  up  an  impressive  storm  of  carnival  jazz  but  the  bass  is  very  pedestrian  and  upfront  they're  woefully  weak  even  with  Christos  Tolera  doing  a  joint  lead  vocal  with  Sullivan. The  follow  up "Klacto  Vee  Sedstein"   compounded  their  problems  with  a  solo  vocal  from  Sullivan  whose  thin  nasal  tones  are  hopelessly  inadequate  but  as  he  was  writing  most  of  the  songs  he  could  hardly  be  sacked. Add  to  that  a  title  that  deterred   people  from  asking  for  it  over  the  counter  and  an  intro  that  consisted  of  adenoidal  sniffing and  it  did  well  to  get  as  high  as  number  50.

After  that  they  were  finished  , their  reputation  as  a  failed  hype  preceding  them. Their  debut  album  "Chewing  The  Fat"  , featuring  new  keyboards  player  Danny  White   reached  the  dizzy  heights  of  number  80  in  the  autumn  of  1982  and  subsequent  singles  failed  to  chart. Along  with  Poncioni,  Mark  and   Danny  decided  to  quit  the  group  in  1983 and  form  their  own  outfit. To  help  out  on  vocals  they  recruited  Polish  exile  Basia  Trzetrzelewska   a  well  known  singer  on  the  Polish  rock scene  such  as  it  was.

At  first  they  called  themselves  Bronze  but  soon  changed  their  name  to  Matt  Bianco  after  an  imaginary  spy  character. They  got  a  deal  with  WEA  towards  the  end  of  the  year.

"Get  Out  Of  Your  Lazy  Bed"   was  their  debut  single. Although  Poncioni  is  pictured  on  the  back  of  the  sleeve  he'd  left  the  group  by  then  and  only  plays  on  the  B-side. It's  a  long  time  since  I  last  heard  this  and  what  strikes  me  first  is  how  electronic  it  actually  is  with  only  the  drums  and  sax  sounding  like  they're  not  being  played  on  a  synthesiser. I've  already  declared  my  lack  of  love  for  jazz  so  this  was  never  going  to  float  my  boat  but  I  can  see  why  it  was  successful. The  song  is  slight  and  Mark's  vocals  are   pretty  ordinary  ( though  much  better  than  Sullivan's  in  his  old  band )   but  it  moves  along  at  a  fair  lick  and  Basia's  multi-tracked   scatted  contributions  are  the  icing  on  the  cake, surely  the  reason  it  was  a  Top  20  hit.

466 Goodbye Hot Chocolate - I Gave You My Heart ( Didn't I ? )

Chart  entered : 4  February  1984

Chart  peak : 13

This  is  by  no  means  the  last  time  Hot  Chocolate  were  in  the  charts  but  it  was  their  last  new  hit. Following  their  debut  in  1970  they  had  become  one  of  the  most  consistent  hit  making  outfits , placing  at  least  one  record  on  the  singles  chart  in  every  calendar   year  since  then. Their  only  chart  topper  was  1977's  "So  You  Win  Again"  and   their  fortunes  vacillated  from  song  to  song  with  the  occasional  dud  that  missed  the  chart  altogether. The  single  immediately  preceding  this   was  one  of  those. There  had  been  line  up  changes. Drummer  Ian  King  left  in  1973  and  was  replaced  by  Tony  Connor  previously  with  Audience  and  Jackson  Heights.  Two  years  later  one  of  the  twin  poles  of  the  band  Tony  Wilson  quit  for  a  solo  career  leaving  Errol  Brown  as  the  main  songwriter  and  sole  vocalist.  Patrick  Olive  switched  from  percussion  to  take  up  Tony's  bass  duties.

"I  Gave  You  My  Heart  ( Didn't I ) "  was  the  third  and , by  some  distance,  the  most  successful  single  from  their  1983  album  "Love  Shot" . If  that  seems  unusual,  bear  in  mind  that  compilations  apart  , they  never  sold  many  albums  and  "Love  Shot"  hadn't  charted  at  all  so  what  order  the  singles  were  released  in  hardly  mattered. The  song  was  written  by  Racey  singer  Richard  Gower. It's  a  Motown  pastiche  with  the  usual  impeccable  vocal  from  Errol  as  the  abandoned  lover  and  hooks  a  plenty. Its  release  just  before  Valentine's  Day  helped  it  along too. What  does  strike  me  though  is  how  tinny  and  cheap- sounding   ( to  go  with  the  tawdry  sleeve  perhaps  ? )  the  arrangement  is,  with  Larry  Ferguson's  synths  sounding  like  Bontempis.

What  was  Mickie  Most  thinking  of  ? Well  probably  his  retirement  , having  recently  sold  the  RAK  label  to  EMI  though  he  retained  control  of  the  studio.  Kim  Wilde  had  already  released  her  last  single  on  the  label  and  as  far  as  I  can  tell  this  was  his  last  new  hit  as  a  producer.  Contrary  to  many  sources  his  son's  band  Johnny  Hates  Jazz  were  only  on  the  label  for  their  first  unsuccessful  single  ( the  hits  were  on  Virgin )  and  he  never  produced  them  though  doubtless  was  a  big  influence  behind  the  scenes. Instead  RAK  the  label  just  petered  out  with  a  string  of  flops  by  has-beens  and  no-marks  ( Cole ? 3D ? McVay ? Howcher ? )  few  of  them  actually  produced  by  Mickie  himself. He  was  diagnosed  with  cancer  in  2000  and  died  three  years  later  aged  64.

This  left  Hot  Chocolate  in  a  state  of  limbo. They  were  not  involved  in  Band  Aid  at  all  and  seem  to  have  been  inactive  before  re-grouping  in  February  1986   for  the  single  "Heartache  No  9" . Always  noted  ( not  always  appreciatively )  for  assimilating  current  musical  trends  into  their  music,  it  was  a  contemporary  urban  track  with  echoes  of  Prince, written  by  the  R& B  writing  team  of  Sturken  and  Rogers. Errol  and  the  boys  do  it  as  competently  as  ever  with  Pete  Wingfield  producing   and  it  was  almost  a  hit , reaching  76  in  the  Bubbling  Under  section.

At  this  point  Errol  decided  to  quit  the  band  to  spend  more  time  with  his  young  family   and  the  rest  of  the  boys  elected  to  dissolve  rather  than  try  to  soldier  on  without  him.  As  happened  with  Abba,  their  critical  stock  began  to  rise  almost  as  soon  as  they'd  called  it  a  day. Having  acquired  the  Hot  Chocolate  back  catalogue as  part  of  the  RAK  deal ,  EMI  soon  put  it  to  work  with  a  Ben  Liebrand  remix  of  "You  Sexy  Thing"  which  reached  number  10  at  the  beginning  of  1987.  A  new  compilation  ( their  third ) "The  Very  Best  of  Hot  Chocolate" went  all  the  way  to  the  top .

With  this  vindication  of  his  past  work  there  was  never  a  better  time  for  Errol  to  launch  his  solo  career. In  June  1987  he  reappeared  with  the single  "Personal  Touch" written  by  Swain  and  Jolley, famed  for  their  work  with  Alison  Moyet  and  Bananarama. It's  a  reasonable  bit  of  Paul  Young-style  pop  soul  but  it's  slightly  over-produced  and  a  bit  dated  for  1987. It  reached  number  25  in  the  charts . Perhaps  disappointed  by its  performance  , Errol  was  in  no  rush  to  put  an  album  together   and  it  was  four  months  before  his  next  single,  "Body  Rockin" which  he  wrote  and  former  Landscape  singer  Richard  Burgess  produced. It's  more  contemporary, sounding  like  Living  In  A  Box  but  it's  a  very  ordinary  song  and  peaked  at  51.

The  success  of  the  compilation  hadn't  gone  unnoticed  by  the  other  members  and  in  1988  , Tony, Patrick  and  guitarist  Harvey  Hinsley  resurrected  the  group  with  a  new  singer,  Grant  Evelyn. Errol  apparently  gave  his  blessing  and  Larry  who'd  already  begun  a  long  second  career  as  a  studio  engineer  before  the  group  split raised  no  objections. Without  Errol  though  they  could  only  get  a  record  deal  in  Germany. They  released  three  singles  there  that  year  "Never  Pretend", "What  About  You"  and  "Get  It  Right". Evelyn 's  voice  is  a  dead  ringer  for    Peter  Cox   of  Go  West  and  if  I'd  heard  them  blind  that's  who  I'd  sworn  it  was. The  first-named  song  reached  number  50  on  the  German  chart  which  wasn't  enough  to  sustain  them  and  they  broke  up  again.

Still  taking  it  easy , Errol  released  just  the  one  single  in  1988. "Maya"  is  a  blast  of  Fairlight  pop  with  world  music  pretensions  hence  Errol  singing  in  an  African  accent. It  didn't  make  the  chart. At  the  beginning  of  1989  he  came  out  with  "Love  Goes  Up  And  Down"  an  unremarkable  house  track  with  rock  guitar   co-written  by  Harry  Casey which  bubbled  under  but  didn't  make  the  Top  75. He  then  finally  put  an  album  out , "That's  How  Love  Is"  which  included  all  the  previous  singles  bar  "Body  Rockin"  and  bombed  completely.  Errol  later  dismissed  it  saying "It  was  a  tired  album. I  was  tired, the  people  who  gave  me  advice  were  tired  and  I'd  stopped  working  with  Mickie  Most. To  have  someone  who  knows  a  song - that's  gold  dust".

Errol  did  contrive  to  give  the  impression  in  later  years  that  his  solo  career  had  ended  there  leaving  him  free  to  race  his  horses  and  entertain  Tory  party  conferences  but  that  wasn't  really  the  case. He  was  dropped  by  WEA  but  then  sold  his  soul  to  the  devil  and  did  a  Christmas  single  with  Stock, Aitken  and  Waterman  at  the  end  of  1990. He  co-wrote  "Send  A  Prayer ( To  Heaven )   with  the  terrible  trio  and  it's  not  hideous, just  a  dreary  synth  ballad  with  echoes  of  "A  Child's  Prayer"  and  "Put  You  Together  Again" . By  that  time  the  fortunes  of  SAW  themselves  were  beginning  to  wane  and  the  single  was  largely  ignored.

Errol  then  went  over  to  Germany  to  work  with  Dieter  Bohlen  of  Modern  Talking. He  wrote  Errol's  next  single  in  1992 ,  "This  Time  It's  Forever"  a  SAW  facsimile  which sounds  pretty  similar  to  Donna  Summer's  This  Time  I  Know  It's  For  Real .  Errol's  voice  is  starting  to sound  a  bit  ragged  on  it  . It  reached  number  26  in  Germany. He  made  two  albums  there  ( I'm  not  sure  Bohlen  was  involved  with  the  second  one ) of  utterly  generic  Euro-pop  with  vague  echoes  of  past  glories  bottoming  out  with  "Emmalene ( That's  No  Lie )"  an  utterly  redundant  re-write  of  Hot  Chocolates  finest  three  minutes,  "Emma".

1992  was  also  the  year  that  Harvey, Patrick  and  Olive  re-launched  the  band  for  the  second  time, with  another  new  singer  Greg  Bannis. They  made  an  album  in  Germany,  "Strictly  Dance" , which  was  released  the  following  year  . All  I've  heard   is  one  of  a  couple  of  singles  they  took  from  it,  "Cry  Little Girl"  which  sounds  like  Snap.  It  did  nothing  and  in  the  same  year  another  compilation  "Their  Hottest  Hits"  made  number  one  in  the  UK   and  "It  Started  With  A  Kiss"  was  a  hit  again  reaching  number 31. The  band  took  the  hint  and  have  trod  the  nostalgia  circuit  ever  since  with  Kennie  Simon  replacing  Bannis  in  2010.

Errol  returned  to  the  UK  in  1997  just  in  time  to  see  The  Full  Monty  take  the  UK  by  storm. In  its  wake  "You  Sexy  Thing"  charged  up  the  charts  a  third  time  reaching  number  6. "It  Started  With  A  Kiss"  was  also  a  hit  third  time  round  reaching  number  18. It  was  oddly  credited  to  Hot  Chocolate  featuring  Errol  Brown   and  was  the  last  time  either  featured  in  the  singles  chart.  Errol  was  not  slow  to  capitalise  on  this  fresh  resurgence  and  did  tours  of  the  UK  and  Germany  in  1998-99.

He  also  secured  a  deal  with  Universal  for  a  new-ish   album  "Still  Sexy"  which  was  released  in  2001. With  3  covers  , a  re-recording  of  "Heaven's  In  The  Back  Seat  of  My  Cadillac"  and  four  songs  that  had  already  featured  on  his  German  albums  he  wasn't  pushing  the  boat  out  in  terms  of  new  songs. The  title  track  and  lead  single  was  new  but  isn't  very  remarkable , Errol  just  humming  along  to  a  contemporary  dance  pop  production  but  he  looked  like  he  was  enjoying  himself  in the  video  which  had  him  in  a  casino  surrounded  by  young  chicks. It  wasn't  a  hit  but  the  album  managed  a  couple  of  weeks  in  the  chart  reaching  number  34.  With  that  his  recording  account  was  closed.

In  2003  he  received  an  MBE. Six  years  later  he  decided  to  retire  from  performing  and  did  a  farewell  tour  of  the  UK. He  died  at  his  home  in  the  Bahamas  of  liver  cancer  last  May.

So  what  of  those  who  left  earlier. Larry's  career  as  a  US-based  studio  engineer  working  on  soundtracks  and  with  R &B  artists  seems  to  have  carried  on  almost  to  the  present  day.

Ian  played  on  Tony's  first  solo  LP  and  did  some  work  with  Gil  Scott-Heron  but  otherwise  his  subsequent  career  is  a  mystery.

That  just  leaves  Tony  who  left  disgruntled  at  being  sidelined  by  Errol  and  Most. The  latter  felt  that  Errol  had  the  more  commercially  appealing  voice  and  their  subsequent  fortunes  suggest  he  was  on  the  money  yet  again  but  the  group  lost  that  darker  edge  apparent  on  "Brother  Louie"  and  "Emma"  once  he'd  quit. Having  said  that,  his  first  solo  single  for  seven  years,  "I  Like  Your  Style"  in  October  1976,  was  a  lightweight  piece of  disco  froth  which  doesn't  hold  much  interest  other  than  Tony's  own  febrile  bass  line. An  LP  of  the  same  title  soon  followed.  The  next  single  "Anything  That  Keeps  You  Satisfied " is  another  jolly  tune  in  the  same  vein. The  third  single  "New  York  City  Life"  is  very  different, the  missing  link  between  In  the  Ghetto  and  The  Message  with  a  grim  tale  of  vice  and  squalor  set  to  an  understated  moody  urban  soul  soundtrack  topped  off  with  a  dolorous  guitar  solo. It's  the  standout  track  on  the  album, some  of  which  sounds  pretty  close  to  his  old  group. It  didn't  sell. Most  was  right  that  Tony's  voice  wasn't  as  distinctive   and  without  airplay  nothing  happened  for  him.

Bearsville  let  him  make  another  album  in  1979. "Catch  One"  was  partly  recorded  at  Muscle  Shoals  and  the  songs  are  generally  a  bit  meatier.  The  one  UK  single  "Try  Love"  is  a  terrific  funk  pop  number  that  should  have  been  a  hit. Instead  the  one  track  that  did  meet  with  some  success  was  his  cover  of  Randy  Vanwarmer's  "Just  When  I  Needed  You  Most" which  sold  a  million  in  Brazil. That  wasn't  enough  for  Bearsville  who  cast  him  adrift.

Tony  retreated  back  to  Trinidad  where  he  became  involved  in  producing  and  writing  for  local  artists  including  his  daughter  Joanne. In  1982  he  collaborated  with  Vanwarmer  who  produced  his  version  of  another  RW  song  "Only  What  You  Steal"  a  rather  nice  soft  rock  ballad. The  B-side , a  co-write  "Hangin  Out  In  Space"  a  doomy  synth  ballad   that  you  wouldn't  have  expected  from  either  of  them  , was  released  in  the  US  in  its  own  right  the  following  year .

Tony's  final  album  to  date  was  "Walking  The  Highwire"  in  1988. The  lead  single  was  "Mandela ( Not  Even  Rivers  Run  Free )  is  a  clumsy  repetitive  bit  of  bandwagon  jumping  with  an  ill-suited  marriage  of  trilling  flutes  and  robotic  synths. The  follow up  "Part  Of  What  You'll  Get  "   was   a   touching  piano  ballad  with  a  gorgeous  melody   ( though  the  album      version   is  more  electric  and  is  grossly  inferior ). Unfortunately  the  former  is  more  indicative  of  the  album  as  a  whole  which  is  horribly  over-produced  synth  pop.

Tony  had  a  couple  of  one-off  collaborations  in  the  nineties  , a  German  single  with  a  group   Moving  Emotion  called  "Kiss  On  The  Radio "   and  a  recording  with  2Pac  "Just  One  Time"  which  would  be  better  without  the  rapper's  contribution. Since  then  Tony's  been  happily  living  in  Trinidad   where  he's  well  respected. It's  a  shame  he's  been  largely  forgotten  here.

465 Hello Prefab Sprout - Don't Sing

Chart  entered : 28  January  1984

Chart  peak : 62

Number  of  hits : 16

My  regular  travelling  companions  to  away  games  have  always  loved  this  lot. It  took  me  quite  a  while  to  warm  to  them.

Prefab  Sprout  were  formed  as  far  back  as  1977  by  brothers  Paddy  and  Martin  McAloon   and  drummer  Michael  Salmon  in  Durham . Paddy  went  to  the  boarding  school  run  by  the  priests  at  the  Catholic  seminary , Ushaw  College,  leading  to  the  widespread  misconception  that  he  trained  to  be  a  priest. In  fact  he  studied  Humanities  at  Newcastle  Polytechnic  before  working  at  his  parents'  garage. The  trio  were  originally  just   a  provincial  punk  outfit  although  their  songs  were  mostly  Paddy  originals.

Paddy  sent  out  demo  tapes  to  no  avail  and  so  took  the  indie  route  in  1982. The  band  paid  for  a  recording  session  at  a  local  studio  using  money  Martin  had  earned  through  two  months  working  as  a  night  watchman. The  result  was  the  single  "Lions  In  My  Own  Garden ( Exit  Someone  ) "  on  their  own  Candle  label.  The  song  takes  its  acrostic  title  from  the  French  town  his  girlfriend  was  studying  in  ( Limoges )  which  gives  you  some  idea  of  the  sort  of  mind  we're  dealing  with  here. The  lyric  seems  to  be  somewhat  obliquely  about  missing  her. Paddy's  voice  is  similar  to  Aztec  Camera's   Roddy  Frame,  shorn  of  the  Caledonian  vowels   and  there  is  a  hint  of  the  lovelorn  melody  that  became  his  trademark  but  the  sound  is  unmistakably  early  eighties  indie  with  a  spiky  guitar  sound  that  the  added  touches  of  harmonica  and  glockenspiel  can't  sweeten.

They  went  on  the  road  to  promote  it  adding  two  new  female  backing  vocalists  Wendy  Smith  and  Feona  Attwood  and  in  September  went  to  a  studio  at  Durham  University  to  record  a   second  single  "The  Devil  Has  All  The  Best  Tunes". Well  he  might  have  but  that  wasn't  one  of  them, a  ridiculously over-wordy  meta-song  about  songwriting  which  doesn't  allow  the  music  a  second  in  which  to  breathe . It  doesn't  sound  like  they're  playing  in  time  either.

Nevertheless,  it  was  sufficient  to  attract  the  attention  of   Tyneside's  answer  to  Tony  Wilson, Keith  Armstrong  who  put  them  on  at  his  club  and  signed  them  up  to  his  new  label  Kitchenware  ( minus  Attwood whose  stay was  never  intended  to  be  permanent ). In  April  1983  the  first  single  was  re-released. I  remember  them  getting  some  play  on  David  Jensen  but  thought  it  was  just  run  of  the  mill  indie  and  they'd  never  get  anywhere  with  such  a  stupid  name. Salmon  then  quit  to  form  his  own  band  and  the  band  had  to  record  their  first  album "Swoon"  with  an  array  of  session  drummers  including  Aztec Camera's Dave  Ruffy. Kitchenware  re-issued  the  second  single  to  mark  time.

"Don't  Sing "  was  released  in  January  1984  as  the  lead  single  for  "Swoon" . By  this  time,  with  exposure  on  the  night  time  Radio  One  shows   and  a  support  tour  with  Elvis  Costello  , they'd  built  enough  of  a  student  following  to  make  it  a  minor  hit.  The  lyric  is  based  on  Graham  Greene's  novel   The  Power  And  The  Glory  about  religious  persecution  in  Mexico   and  the  music  also  presents  a  challenge  resting  on  a  jangly  riff  not  too  dissimilar  to  the  Doobie  Brothers'  Long  Train  Running  and   Martin's  suspect  bass  playing. The  chorus  is  complex   and  hardly  sing  a  long  material.  The  album  did  better  , peaking  at  22  without  yielding  a   follow  up  hit.

464 Hello Madonna - Holiday

Chart  entered  : 14  January  1984

Chart  peak : 6  ( 2  on  re-release  in  1985, 5  on  re-issue  in  1991 )

Number  of  hits : 70

This  feels  like  another  landmark  as  we  reach  someone  who  has  never  really  lost  her  iron  grip  on  the  singles  chart. Between  this  debut  and  2010  there  was  only  one  year-2007-  when  she  didn't  have  something  on  the  chart  and  she's  scored  hits  off  the  two  albums  she's  had  out  since  then.

Madonna  Ciccone  was  born  in  Michigan  in  1958  but  moved  to  New  York  in  1977  to  further  a  career  in  dance. She  worked  as  a  waitress  as  well  as  performing  in  modern  dance  troupes  to  support  herself.  She  also  did  a  nude  photoshoot  in  1979  with  photographer  Lee  Friedlander  as  a  particularly  hirsute  brunette. Friedlander  is  a  respected  artist  but  he  wasn't  above  selling  the  pictures  to  Playboy  in  1985. She  also  appeared  topless  in  an  independent  film  A  Certain  Sacrifice  which  is  badly  filmed, almost  incomprehensible  and  would  be  just  mouldering  in  someone's  attic  were  it  not  for  her  subsequent  fame.

  In  1979  her  musical  career  began  when  she  came  through  an  audition  to  be  a  dancer  and  backing  vocalist  for  French  disco  star  Patrick  Hernandez  who  enjoyed  a  brief  burst  of  fame  with  the  song  "Born  To  Be  Alive"  ( which  I hated ). She  lived  in  Paris  for  a  while  but  didn't  enjoy  her  time  there  and  returned  to  New  York  moving  in  with  a  musician  Dan  Gilroy  that  she  had  met  just  before  setting  off. He  taught  her  to  play  the  drums  and  guitar  and  she  started  writing  songs. In  the  summer  of  1980  they  formed  a  band  The  Breakfast  Club. Though  she  started  out  as  the  drummer she  quickly  found  her  way  to  the  front  of  the  stage. The  odd  demo  has  surfaced  from  this  period  sounding  like  early  Blondie  with  a  very  inferior  singer.

Madonna  wanted  to  strike  out  on  her  own  very  quickly  and  in  the  autumn  of  1980  called  up  her  old  boyfriend  Steve  Bray  to  form  a  new  band  called  Emmy. She  and  Bray  started  writing  some  of  the  songs  that  would  end  up  on  her  first  album. In  1981  she  did  some  backing  vocals  for  German  producer  Otto  Von  Wernherr.  When  she  made  it  big,  Wernherr  used  these  small  scraps  of  songs , inexpertly  sung, on  an  endless  string  of  dance  mixes  with  her  name  and  image  plastered  across  the  sleeves. She  went  to  court  to  stop  him  and  though  he  succeeded  in  fighting  her  off,  nobody  bought  the  records. The  public's  not  that  easily  fooled.

After  a  gig  at  Max's  Kansas  City  in  the  spring  of  1981  Emmy  were  offered  a  recording  contract  but  Madonna  received  an  alternative  offer  from  Camille  Barbone, head  of  a  New  York  recording  studio  to  manage  her  as  a  solo  artist. Madonna  took  the  latter  option  and  allowed  Barbone  to  fire  off  the  band  but  they  soon  clashed  over  musical  direction. Barbone  was  a rock  fan  but  Madonna  thought  disco  was  now  where  the  action  was . In  September  1982  she  walked  out  on  her  contract  with  Barbone  and  started  hustling  her  own  action  at  the  hip  Danceteria  club  , hassling  the  DJs  to  play  her  demo  tape.  It  paid  off . DJ  Mark  Kamins  had  contacts  at  Sire  Records  and  landed  her  a  deal.

Kamins  produced  her  debut  single  "Everybody" a  celebration  of   the  escapism  and   euphoria  of  the  New  York  dance  scene  in  the  synth-heavy   mutant  disco  style  of  Talking  Heads  offshoot  the  Tom  Tom  Club . It's  got  a  decent  tune  but  is  a  bit  tame  rhythmically. Her second  release,  the  unashamedly  sexual   "Burning  Up "  has  a  rockier  edge  to  it  similar  to  Michael  Jackson's  Beat  It  .  

In  September  1983  she  released  her  second  single  in  the  UK  "Lucky  Star" .  It  had   simultaneously  a  poppier  sheen   and  lyric   and  a  harder  electro-funk  backing  track. She  paid  a  short  promotional  visit  to  the  UK  doing  "track  dates"   i.e  lip-synching  at  the  Hacienda  ( Kamins   had  a  mutually  beneficial  relationship  with  the  Factory  team )  and  the  Camden  Palace. The  former  was  not  the  appearance  filmed  by  The  Tube   which  is  often   wrongly claimed  to  be  her  first  British  appearance. The  song  became  her  second  UK  hit  on  re-release  in  1984.

At  the  same  time, "Holiday"  had  been  chosen  as  the  next  single  in  the  US. It  broke  her  in  the  US  reaching  number  16  so  it  was  the  natural  choice  for  the  next  single  in  Britain. She  came  back  to  the  Hacienda  for  another  lip-synching  performance  and  was  rather  disappointed  when  the  audience  threw  bread  rolls  at  her. This  was  the  performance  that  featured  on  The  Tube   which,  no  doubt,  did  help  her   but  the  single  was  already  in  the  Top  20  when  it  was  broadcast.

For  a  record  that's  been  a  Top  10  hit  on   three  separate  occasions  I  still  find  "Holiday"  somewhat  underwhelming.  Kamis  had  become  the  first  of  many  musical  collaborators  to  be  put  aside  in  favour  of  a hotter  talent , in  this  case  a  rival  DJ  John  Jellybean  Benitez. He  brought  her  the  song  which  had  been  written  by  two  members  of  a dance  group  Pure  Energy  and  produced  it  for  her. With  a  synthesized  string  arrangement  and  piano  break  from  Fred  Zarr  and  plenty  of  funk  guitar  it's  more  musically  sophisticated  than  her  previous singles  but  it's  still  a  fairly  straightforward  disco  track  with  an   indifferent  vocal, uninteresting  lyric   and  not  much  of  a  chorus.  She  would  go  on  to  make  much  better  records  than  this.  

463 Hello Cyndi Lauper - Girls Just Want To Have Fun

Chart  entered :  14  January  1984

Chart  peak : 2  ( 4  re-recorded  and re-titled  "Hey  Now "  in  1994 )

Number  of  hits : 16

We  move  into  1984  now  and  the  girls  start  to  get  a  bigger slice  of  the  action.

Cynthia  Lauper  was  born  in  1953  ( attempts  to  trim  a  few  years  off  her  age  in  1984  were  scuppered  by  her  reminiscing  about  seeing  the  Beatles  live  )  to  a  German  father  and  Italian  mother . After  a  turbulent  time  at  school  she  left  home  at  17  to  escape  an  abusive  stepfather. She  spent  most  of  the  seventies  working  in  covers  bands  in  New  York  until  she  damaged  her  vocal  cords  and  had  to  take  a  year  off. Some  sources  say  Cyndi  released  a   cover  of  Fleetwood  Mac's  "You  Make  Loving  Fun"  in  1977  but  this  is  disputed  and  having  heard  "it"  I'm  drawn  to  the  latter  camp; the  backing  track  is  all  wrong  for  1977  and  the  vocal  sounds  like  a  treated  version  of  the  Christine  McVie  original. There's  also  nothing  about  it  on  45cat.

In  1978  Cyndi  met  saxophonist  John  Turi  and  formed  the  band  Blue  Angel  who  were  eventually  signed  by  Polydor. Blue  Angel  were  a  new  wave  band  with  transparent  sixties  and  fifties  influences  headed  up  by  Cyndi's  remarkable  voice. Their  one  eponymous  album  in  1980  is  a  strong  set  of  songs  with  no  obvious  reason  for  its  failure  other  than  it  was  released  at  a  time  when  the  competition  was  exceptionally  strong. Their  competent  cover  of  Gene  Pitney's  "I'm  Gonna  Be  Strong"  reached  number  37  in  Holland  and  led  to  some  appearances  on  European  TV  but  that  was  as  good  as  it  got. The  following  year  the  band  collapsed  acrimoniously  and  Cyndi  had  to  file  for  bankruptcy  after  being  sued  by  the  manager. She  went  back  to  the  New  York  clubs  supporting  herself  with  jobs  in  retail  and  waitressing. She  got  another  chance  after  meeting  David  Wolf  who  became  her  manager  and  got  her  signed  with  Portrait  Records.

"Girls  Just  Want  To  Have  Fun"  was  the  lead  single  from  her  debut  album  "She's  So  Unusual"  released  at  the  same  time. The  song  was  originally  demo'ed  by  obscure  US  songwriter  Robert  Hazard. In  that  form  it  was  a  hard  and  fast  New  Wave  track , halfway  between  The  Cars  and  The  Boomtown  Rats,  and  sounded  like  a  carping  complaint  rather  than  a  celebration  of  good  times. Cyndi  tweaked  the  lyrics  ( with  Hazard's  blessing )  and  turned  it  into  a  pop  song. With  a  slamming  take  no  prisoners  machine  beat   similar  to  A  Flock  of  Seagulls  ' Wishing ( If  I  Had  A  Photograph  Of  You )  a  springy  rhythm  and  quirky  synth  lines , Cyndi  turned  it  into  a   lightly  feminist  declaration  of  intent.  It  does  go  on  too  long; Cyndi  could  have  done  with  adding  an  extra  verse  rather  than  over-extending  the  final  chorus  but  it  got  her off  the  mark  on  both  sides  of  the  Atlantic. Ten  years  later  she  re-visited  the song  for  a compilation  album  setting  it  against  an  Ace  of  Base  pop  reggae  shuffle  and  it  was  almost  as  big  a  hit  again. That  could  well  have  influenced  a   just-formed  girl  band  then  just  getting  their  act  together  and  whose  signature  song  carries  pretty  much  the  same  message.

Whether  the  song  really  helped  Cyndi's  career  in  the  long  term  is  another  question; I  suspect  your  average  pop  fan  would  struggle  to  name  more  than  three  of  her  other  hits. With  Cyndi's  deliberately  bratty  vocal  , kooky  dress  sense  and   amusing  video  it  was  easily  mistaken  for  a  novelty  hit  and  were  it  not  for  the  slow burning  charms  of  the  follow  up  "Time  After  Time"  ( which  peaked  at  54  initially ) she  could  easily  have  been  another  Toni  Basil  in  chart  terms. Morrissey , reviewing  one  of  her  singles  for  Smash  Hits   later  in  the  year,  disparaged  her  as  "She's  So  Incredibly  Ordinary"  and  I  suspect  there  are  still  some  who  dismiss  her  on  the  basis  of  this  song. Of  course  one  other  factor  that  may  have  held  her  back  was  emerging  at  exactly  the  same  time  as  another  female  singer  from  the  Big  Apple  who  is  the  subject  of  the  very  next  post...